Saturday, June 29, 2013

Blackhole

I have spent my days months and years wondering,
The answer to life is nowhere to be seen,
Sailing in an old scotch bottle,
The answer is lost in the pacific.
All directions show no promise;
None shows the path to true happiness.
I hear, I listen, I even try to see,
But the words that fumble from my mouth,
Are still melancholic and shear,
People try to guide me to wisdom;
They try to show me light.
My questions are bigger, beyond the natural,
My questions are beyond the heaven and the hell,
They have a mind of their own.
I realize now how small and insignificant I am,
The answers I begged for make me feel weak and low,
These are not the words you tell a sailor,
Who is yet to start the engine of his Titanic.
These words consume everything you once felt or will ever feel,
They take you to a different dimension,
Where real is unreal,
Where real is surreal.
I hope I could not have heard it,
I hope somebody had stopped me,
But as I waited for that somebody to appear,
My answers presented to me an alternate reality.
Now I want to go back to the place I come from.
I want to forget everything,
My questions, their answers, their significance, their depth, everything.
I want to be that child I once was,
Not the child who yells without any vocal chords.
I try to be my past self.
I try to rewind to restart.
But then again as I try,
Those question do not stop the haunt,
They chase me again almost taking control,
I fight with might with all the energy I can muster,
And I am winning those daily battles.
But I am afraid I am losing my life's greatest war.

-Aanshik Gupta,
3rd Year Meta

Thursday, June 13, 2013

Haze

Lost in the middle of a crowd
Every one is familiar, but just
Strangers jostling you by as they pass
All a part of your life and yet so unfamiliar
Your feet begin to move of their own accord
And before you know it you've crossed the same path
Several hundreds of times
"Where do I want to go?" you have no answer.

Reflections, images, shapes, moving around,
You can see your face, but just
A plethora of colors all around you
A multitude of faces, and shadows
All move with a purpose, all move with a finality
They seem to know exactly what's going on,
They seem to know exactly what they want
Before you know it, you lose your face amidst them all.
"Who am I?" you have no answer.

Streaks, ribbons of light, fill your vision
You are trying to breathe, but just
You can feel your heart throbbing violently
Perfectly in sync with your feet pounding wildly on the ground
Everything is blurry now, you realize you're weeping
Things go whizzing past your ears, sounds, music
In too deep, so lost, so hopeless
And when you finally open your eyes
You're staring precariously at the edge of the precipice
You let it all out, the anger, frustration, despair,
Overwhelmed by the melancholy of it all
And then you're diving head first.
"What have I done?", you have no answer.

Kicking, struggling, trying to resurface
Light within reach, but just
The depth so inviting so alluring,
Almost beginning to grow warm
The tendrils of comfort begin to over power,
The will to break free
The instinct to live, to be, tries to flare up
But that is squashed out by some invisible force
"What do I really want?" you have no answer.


-Priya Ravi
3rd Year